I had an assignment to do in math class, the one class where Inever do my work. I knew I wasn’t going to do it. Not because it was hard or consuming, but simply because i couldn’t catch myself sitting for 10 minutes to do my work.

It was bad, very bad, so bad I would tighten my fist every time I had to check how much missing assignments I had, yet nothing changed. 

I was still on my phone, constantly doom scrolling, hoping to find the next video that will have my voice echoing rooms ahead. It was an addiction. An addiction so strong that I was aware and didn’t want to stop it. 

Every time someone asked me to watch a movie or show with them, I would politely decline. I knew my attention span was fried, and I didn’t know what to do about it.

It got to the point where I found watching two minute videos exhausting and too long because I was so used to watching my 10 second tiktok shorts. If I was watching an explanation video on tiktok I would always fast forward 20 seconds ahead because the thought of watching a one minute video sounded daunting.

Realizing the impact social media had on me made me more open minded. I considered stopping, but knowing me, that was never happening. I knew I could stop, and I knew it had a negative impact on me, so my only next option was to manage this addiction. I didn’t completely drop down my device but I started watching movies, later tuning into shows until I could regain my focus to watch long videos. 

Social media is exhausting.