In 2006 a man by the name of David Foster Wallace delivered a beautiful graduation speech to Kenyon College, it was titled “This Is Water.” Although his speech was targeted at young adults who are on the border of becoming full on adults, I think the message can be used universally too. 

In his speech Wallace goes on to point out that we as a society have this hard-wired self-centeredness that we inherited in our nature at birth. We tend to think of ourselves as the center of the universe and that the entire world must revolve around oneself.

He uses experience of navigating everyday life and how it can be annoying, frustrating and cause this built up resentment towards others. But who’s to blame you, right?

The world that you live in is only experienced through your lens. Every experience you’ve gained or went through, you’ve been the absolute center of. If you want to know other people’s thoughts and or emotions they have to be communicated to you in some way. On the other hand, your thoughts and feelings happen within an instant and seem more authentic. 

He’s not writing this speech to teach people how to be compassionate but rather the importance of staying aware and to look beyond just our immediate perspective. When something is an inconvenience to us throughout the day we revert to these negative emotions, it’s the self-centeredness rooted inside of us.

In these situations it’s all about you and your desires, it can feel like the entirety of the world is in your way. We all as a society struggle to do this. We’re all so submerged in our own heads getting sucked in by the constant monologue going on we often miss the most obvious and important realities. 

 It’s hard at times, to stay alert and attentive enough to know that there’s this whole other world right in front of you and inside you but it’s not impossible. Those who are aware of this self-centeredness and do nothing to change it, are choosing to live a life of bitterness and aggravation. You have control over the ways you think and what things you give purpose to. You have the option to alter and break free from your default-setting of self-centeredness.